Thomas Hoskyns Leonard
He met her in the Shambles,
Took her out of crush
To York museum cafe for a chat.
Steph had fine intellect
And lovely eyes.
So he laid her in Jack's house
To avoid slumbering boar;
Laid her good he did
And she retaliated in kind
Till his cheeks flushed like rosebuds,
And his toes prickled like hedgehogs
Chewing their cud.
Then they ate strawberries
And sipped the nectar divine,
As they as one person together entwined,
Then she was gone.
Whereto? Jason pined
And for three weeks to his ageing flatmate he whined.
But then a Facebook message!
In Derby she was, working away,
Lusting for him, and wanting to meet one more day.
So back to Jorvik
For a weekend she came
In his flat, with his senile flatmate
Relegated to his laptop,
Sent to Heisinger's,
And told to party with the bellringers.
When she felt Jason in the kitchen,
He knew how he felt;
And then she turned into a Heavenly dove
By the time his flatmate returned with punnets of fruit
Jason had rearranged his bedroom and his best suit,
But these are visions, and I was but hearing voices,
Realised the old codger, stitching his socks,
Steph was nice to me,
Before she went away to decay
All those myriads of years ago,
And as for Jason?
He was just an Argonaut
With a Golden Fleece,
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