Thomas Hoskyns Leonard Blog

Wednesday, 25 November 2015

THE FISH ROT FROM THE TOP DOWN (in 120 words)

"So what's happening on Earth?" inquired the Crown Oligarch, Princess Natasha of Qinsatorix, thwacking her husband;s posterior with a dragon's whip. (21 words)

"The Duke of Edinburgh broke his neck on a waterslide and had to be destroyed," moaned Prince Hamlet of Denmark, lashing out at a dorgi-corgi, "and the Russians are bombing Ankara."

(32 words)

"Goodie gumdrops! I'll tell the Imperial Chamberlain to super-carrion the Saudis another billion gold pieces, That should stir everything up." (21 words)

"Why don't you send the Brits a battle fleet of UFOs? It would be fun watching them dominating their world again." (21 words)

"What a masterly way of trumping those dreadful Yanks! Aha! Here come the Sirens from Syracuse! Now for the Greek orgy and royal crotch kicking." (24 words)

"Not again! Aaaaaargh!!" (3 words).

Tuesday, 24 November 2015

TRITHAGORAS AND RAINBOW GIRL (in 100 words)

Trithagoras and Rainbow Girl

by Thomas Hoskyns Leonard

"So how do you dispose of the weak and vulnerable in Britain?" purred Ambassador Trithagoras, a blue cat-like felixian from the Planet Qinsatorix. (24 words)

"We invite them to bijou cocktail parties," simpered Rainbow Girl, the Royal Shape-Shifter, twisting her platinum thong, "Then they're taken away in low loaders and incinerated." (27 words)

"How supercalifragilistic," gulped the ambassador, flicking his whiskers. "We throw them down the Venusian's yawning throat." (16 words)

"They suicided Auntie Rosalina with risperidol," smirked Rainbow Girl, stroking her antlers. "She protested too much." (16 words)

"Great stu---," replied Trithagoras, as the IDS sanctioners fired three red-hot arrows into his corpulent belly. (17 words)

THE THREE BRIDGES ON THE FIRTH

MORE COMING! I'm away there to lunch

Friday, 20 November 2015

THOUGHTS AND EVENTS FOR THE WEEK (updated)

I can't even remember what happened on Monday. On Tuesday afternoon, Thomas and I drove in our Toureg Volkswagen to South Queensferry for yet another meal in the Three Bridges Inn, with a great view, believe it or not of the three bridges across the Firth of Forth. I fancied the breaded haddock, with peas, mash, and two fried eggs on the side, while Thomas devoured a mound of pork and black pudding with a fried egg on top. We know how to get on really well nowadays (ever since my re-diagnoses with A.D.D.) in February by not talking too much. though I guess we talked quite a bit anyway, Then we dropped by the historic Cramond Inn for a coffee on the way back, and chose the table with just the right atmosphere, So I treated myself to a rare gin and slimline.

When we got back to Edinburgh, Thomas was off to a choir rehearsal, He is hoping to play Hitler in a production in the Churchill Theatre in the Spring. And Scott and I were off for a meeting of the Edinburgh All Comer's Club in Sofi's bar in Leith

Amanda convened the meeting, and James read his outstanding new poem

A Spot of Lunch

TO BE CONTINUED

Saturday 21st November. Resigned membership of Old Saint Paul's Scottish Episcopal Church giving no specific reason, I had regularly attended High Mass for 10 years.

Sunday 22nd November: Attended, new, much more pleasant church in Central Edinburgh, Not Scottish Episcopal Church,.